Sunday, May 22, 2016

The graduate



This weekend I sat in the crowd of thousands as my youngest daughter walked across the stage to accept her Bachelor of Science Degree in Communications, Magna Cum Laude, from Loyola University Maryland.  Suffice it to say, like with all my kids' graduations, this mom is filled with pride, and both happy and sad emotions.

I can't help but think back to the day she was born.  We were already a family of four -- but Julia completed us. She gave Meaghan the little sister I always wanted her to have, and became the little sister that adored her big brother Matthew, following him in his love for soccer and always looking up to him.  She's a happy-go-lucky, funny little girl, willing, daring, adventuresome and thoughtful. She was so daring that at 4 years old she jumped off the top of the backyard swingset and gave herself a forehead-to-chin swollen scrape that raised accusing eyebrows in public.  She was so adventuresome that she subjected herself to a winter-time outward bound "sailing" trip in the everglades on a boat that ended up being no bigger than a double-wide
canoe; she traveled to Argentina alone to visit a friend; worked in an inner-city DC elementary school for two weeks for her senior project, getting there on a 40 minute metro ride in an area that was totally unfamiliar to her; and studied abroad in Copenhagen without any friends to accompany her.  Her thoughtfulness comes out in her little random acts of kindness, like when she decided to walk through the neighborhood collecting food for the food pantry, and buys gifts for under-privileged kids.

She and her dad were best buds -- she was his sidekick for Sunday breakfast while the big kids and I went to church; they wore matching sweatshirts on the Blue Hills hiking trail, she accompanied him at times at the gym, and was often with him as he worked in the yard or around the house, ready to make him lunch.

Being our baby she was, and is, both independent and attached. She never hesitated giving me a hug in the presence of her friends and loved her pick-up hugs until she was the one picking me up!


After a rough adjustment to college life her freshman year, she took my advice about facing the second semester with an open mind.  Things turned around for her (meeting an awesome young man and great friends didn't hurt) and she graduated with as much sadness for the journey being over as she had pride in her accomplishment of fulfilling her goals.  Now she begins an exciting new adventure with a job hunt in New York City.

I sat in the Royal Farms Arena in Baltimore Saturday next to her boyfriend's mom with my kids and brother-in-law nearby, tears welling up more than once.  I thought about how proud Jeff would be of his baby girl (and of Matthew and Meg), and what an amazing young lady she has become.  I thought of the long journey we have all endured, with the happy times, the bittersweet, and the downright impossible times.  I thought about how Julia has carried herself through it all, and my tears stung a little less as I began to feel sheer excitement for her promising future.


My kids have given me numerous reasons to beam and smile, and who they are becoming as adults makes me realize Jeff and I did alright in the short time we had together to raise them. The rest was up to me, and even more so, the decisions they decided to make on their own.  So far, so good.   I'm a lucky, proud mom.